I Kid Thee Not

Did I ever tell you about the last time I went to the Bush Hill Park Hotel?

Yes? Well I don’t care. I’m going to tell you again anyway.

[there’s no point giving me that look]

Well, it was a Friday evening after work and I was going to have dinner at my sister’s house, who lives around the corner (the nice side, obviously). So I got off the train at Bush Hill Park and, naturally after a hard week at work, I felt like having a quick pint first, so I went to the Bush Hill.

Now I quite like the Bush Hill. I’ve always thought that the bar in the back function room is beautiful and almost worth a visit in itself – and it’s something of a shame that it’s not always open.  Equally, the beer garden is large and well kept and great for the summer.

But the main front bar is basically pretty rubbish. Essentially it’s just a room with chairs and tables and a small bar counter with not really all that much to choose from.

But the main thing about the last time I was in there was that all the TVs – and there are four of them – all large HD wide screens on each wall of a not very big in the first place pub  - were set to the National Geographic channel (which is all very fine and worthy and all) which was showing a documentary about the giant snakes of the Amazon rain forest.

I mean seriously, giant snakes?

Giant fucking snakes in close up on every single fricking’ wide screen high definition television on every single wall in your pub? That’s your plan?

Someone, with remote control in hand, seriously thought to themselves, ‘you know what this pub needs more of? Slimy slithering giant snakes of the Amazon in high definition, that’s what.’