“This is the land of which I swore to give Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, saying, ‘I will give it to your descendants.’ I have caused you to see it with your eyes, but you shall not cross over there.”
I was in Stratford (really, really not one of my favourite places to be) yesterday for a meeting, and as I walked to the building where my meeting was being held I was struck by the fact that there were four or five (seemingly) nice (and fairly similar – as much as you can tell these things from just a quick glance) pubs in quite close proximity to one another; and it got me to wondering about how it is that people choose their locals in situations like that.
And by nice I mean that these were all proper pubs (rather than Chain pubs), the buildings were well maintained and slightly quirky, and that looking through the window there were fairly normal people sat at the bar (on bar stools) and the rest of the seating and tables looked fairly well done.
All by which I mean that if I worked/lived around there, these would all be pubs that I wouldn’t mind stopping in at for a drink [or eleven].
Whereas, in Enfield Town we don’t really have issues of choice as such, in that The George is a Darwinian gladiators pit for the unemployed feral underclass; Bar Form is seemingly only open for a few minutes on the night of a half solar eclipse (and even then not if it’s a Tuesday); The Stag is a soulless...well it’s a soulless I don’t know what as nobody I know has ever been there, such that I’m beginning to wonder if it even exists; the Old Wheatsheaf is far away and up a hill; The Cricketers and Crown and Horseshoe far away and round a bend; the Moon Under Water is only for those actually round the bend – well them and out-door urinaters; The Wheatsheaf perfectly fine for what it is – a scene from Deliverance; and The Kings Head...
Well the Kings Head is the Kings Head.
Which is to say that if you’re a half normal person (in fact let’s say a quarter normal person) arriving to work or live in Town for the first time, you only really have two choices: The Taps or the Kings Head.
Which actually isn’t that hard of a choice depending on the kind of person you are.
The Kings Head is far more of an actual pub than the Taps (in fact there are those who dispute whether the Taps is even a pub – rather than a bar – at all. Those people are mental defectives and shouldn’t be listened to of course), and if that’s what floats your boat then I’d guess that’s where you’d end up.
Decision made; end of.
[That said, as I’ve described often and at dry length. There are many other things at which the Taps far excels]
But in Stratford – as I described, it seemed to me that there were almost half a dozen decent, proper pubs in close proximity to one another – all of which I’d be happy to stop and have a pint in.
So my question is, in that situation, how do you decide? What is it about a place which makes you think: yes, this is it, this will be my local; as opposed to, Good Lord no, not a chance in hell?
Is it the beer? The pretty/handsome barmaids/men? Is it Sky Sports? Indeed, is it the lack of Sky Sport?
So you tell me. Who are you kiddo? What brought you here? What made you stay? And promise me that you’ll never go.
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